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How to Communicate With Your Ex About Co-Parenting

At the heart of any healthy co-parenting arrangement is communication. Unfortunately, many divorced people in Los Angeles find it difficult to make decisions with their exes about things like schooling, medical care, or even residence. Because good communication is so important, HelpGuide.org offers the following tips to help you and your ex co-parent successfully.

Don’t Let Your Feelings Dictate Behavior

It’s natural to be angry after a divorce. However, you shouldn’t make decisions about child care based on your anger towards your ex. The best interest of your child should be the primary goal, and in most cases that entails having a healthy relationship with both parents. Keep communication with your ex simple and to the point and vent your frustrations to a trusted friend or counselor.

Make It a Point to Listen

The only way to make it in a co-parenting relationship is through compromise. That means that both parents must be willing to make sacrifices when necessary to ensure the child is well-cared for. When it comes to scheduling visits, try to incorporate both your needs as best you can. Also, really listen to your ex so you can determine whether their requests are truly valid. While you won’t be able to give much leeway on major decisions, finding common ground on the little things can be extremely helpful.

Aim to Disagree Respectfully

Of course, even when both parties have the best of intentions disagreements will still occur. All you can do in this instance is to resolve to disagree respectfully. Don’t lash out or attack your ex, and don’t always assume that his or her intent is malicious. Also, try not to argue in front of your child if at all possible. This can lead to feelings of guilt, as the child may believe that he or she is the reason for the argument.

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