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How can I co-parent effectively with my ex?

One of the more difficult aspects of divorce is co-parenting with your ex. However, the health and well-being of your children depends on your ability to effectively communicate with your former spouse, whether you’re discussing visitation schedules, academic issues, or healthcare needs. Psychology Today offers the following advice in this case, which will help you co-parent with your ex in order to come to a reasonable outcome.

Set Boundaries

If your children have two sets of rules, chances are behavioral issues will occur. That’s why it’s important that you and your ex set boundaries on rules to ensure your kids have a sense of stability. This extends to things like chores, curfews, and other child-rearing considerations. Routine is important for the development and security of children, even if they find fault with what is expected of them.

Update As Needed

You may also need to update your co-parenting approach from time to time. This will be extremely important as your children age, which means their wants and needs will also evolve. Keep the lines of communication open so that you’re aware of any changes. Additionally, be sure you communicate updates to your ex as necessary.

Don’t Make Assumptions

At some point your child may provide information regarding your ex that you don’t agree with. Instead of immediately making assumptions, take a step back and consider how you would like to react. If you do plan on bringing the matter up with your ex, try to use civil language and refrain from place blame. It may be a simple misunderstanding, or your child may have misunderstood what occurred and passed this information on to you without thinking.

 

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