How to Minimize Conflict During a Child Custody Battle


If you're about to engage in a child custody dispute with your co-parent, reducing conflict may very well be an end-goal for you, and for good reason. The less combative your case is, the easier it will be to establish an effective relationship with your co-parent. Reducing conflict during your custody case could also help your child adjust to the custody arrangement, helping them acclimate to their new lifestyle with minimal challenges.

At TRABOLSI | LEVY | GABBARD LLP, our team is here to fight for your rights and ensure you pursue an outcome that enables you - and your child - to thrive. To schedule a consultation with our team, contact us online or via phone at (310) 455-8364.

Always Keep the Focus on the Child

If you want to reduce conflict in your child custody case, the best thing you can do is depersonalize the case as much as you possibly can. One effective way to do that is by focusing on how the outcome will impact your child, instead of how it will impact you.

For example, let's say that, post-divorce, you move to a location that's further away from your child's school than your co-parent. Sure, having your child at your home less often may not be ideal for you - you love them, of course you want to spend as much time with them as you can.

But is that what's best for your child? Maybe spending four nights a week with the other parent helps your child get some more sleep before heading into school because they don't have to drive as far in the mornings. Maybe there's a friend who lives closer to your co-parent's house that you can rely on to look after your child while you and your co-parent are working.

Constantly evaluate whether the actions you take benefit your child or yourself. It's perfectly normal to want to maximize the time you spend with your kid, but keeping yourself honest about what's best for them during the custody process can help you reach an amicable arrangement with your co-parent more easily.

Consider Family Therapy

Going to therapy with your co-parent and child may seem awkward, but it can do wonders to help everyone maintain positive relationships throughout the divorce process.

An experienced child and/or divorce therapist can help you and your family in numerous ways.

Firstly, they can help you and your co-parent understand how your divorce is likely to impact your child given their development and stage of life.

Secondly, they can provide you and your co-parent with an unbiased, objective point of view during custody debates. It would be difficult for emotions not to play a role in your custody case - after all, we're talking about a legal dispute that will impact how much time you spend with your child. An experienced psychologist can help you and your co-parent cut through the emotional baggage surrounding the divorce and prioritize a solution that facilitates your child's wellbeing.

Finally, a good child therapist will also help your child vocalize how they feel about the divorce process, allowing you and your co-parent to understand your child's perspective on the divorce better.

Set Defined Boundaries

In cases that involve emotions to the degree of most custody disputes, there's always the chance one party will say something they regret, damaging the likelihood of a peaceful outcome.

Set defined boundaries with your co-parent - not only concerning how you communicate with each other, but also how you speak about each other to your child. Ensuring neither party disparages the other is incredibly important.

Both parties should also try and have some compassion for each other. If your co-parent says something hurtful in a moment of emotional displays genuine regret, try to be forgiving - and expect the same from them. Allowing bygones to be bygones will serve you well if the goal is achieving an amicable outcome in your custody dispute.

At TRABOLSI | LEVY | GABBARD LLP, our attorneys are here to support you throughout your custody dispute. To schedule a consultation with our team for your case, contact us online or via phone at (310) 455-8364.

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